Monday, June 23, 2008

Confessions of a perfectionist

Nothing can get done because of too much perfectionism. That's so true. Today I've spent hours completing my group's project, penetrating the bad side of being a perfectionist. I still remember how disappointed and angry I felt when I received the files one of the group members sent me. Total crap! I wish I could pick up the phone and tell her how irresponsible she was. But I didn't since in some way, she was quite pathetic with a husband and a 3-year old boy waiting for her at home. (This has further reinforced my intention of staying single for a long time so that I can enjoy more freedom.)
Back to my group's project. To make up for my partner's carelessness, I needed to revise her part to make it become clearer, richer and more well-organized. But I finally decided to do it all again from the beginning, which means repeating the six steps I followed yesterday: reading - identifying a problem - finding resources - collecting data - analyzing data - and taking action. As a consequence, I felt totally exhausted when I stopped the job which took me nearly six hours working nonstop in front of the computer screen! and it hasn't been done yet! I feela bit regret for having destroying my own health with a less-than-necessary task. Actually I'm sure we'll get away with it even if I only revised her part to somehow satisfy our supervisor. But I wanted things to go my own way and so forgot about myself and...the housework. I've been scolded for not washing the dishes as I promised. You see, that's the very first consequence of being a perfectionist.

No comments: